Spinal Tap? I’m still not sure!

Don’t you just love an unplanned, spontaneous, last minute night out?

Especially when you have no expectations or idea what is ahead.

Late Wednesday afternoon The Canadian sent me a cryptic text message


Personally,  I had never heard of them but thought they can’t be that bad if they can draw a crowd that warrants a stadium show.

With nothing to lose,  free tickets and walking distance from home,  we headed down to the concert via a quick meal at a restaurant where we were seated next to several CFL (Canadian Football League – Like the NFL but the Canadian version) players from the Calgary Stampedes team.   They are in town for the Grey Cup Final being played today in Toronto.   Clearly, the CFL players are the poor cousins of the NFL players over the border and don’t earn the same kind of big bucks judging by the dining venue, the team attire and the bill being split when it arrived.   Another give away was the distinct lack of bling, hardly a diamond or gold Mr T style chain in sight.

The Canadian had arrived home from work late and dinner took longer than expected so we arrived at the concert after it had started, not a problem we thought we will just sneak in but when we arrived at the stadium it was strangely quiet around the concession stands.

We walked through the curtain and bam!!!  Sensory overload …



Multi coloured laser lights, pyrotechnics, electric violins, shooting flames, dancers, it had it all.  Blinded by the lights we attempted to sneak in and find our seats.


Sneak in we couldn’t as the place was packed and our seats located in the middle of a front row on the balcony.

Wait for a gap in the performance?

No gap, one song blended into another, it was an arena spectacular after all and they had many a Christmas song to ruin for me get through.

Seated I began to take in the arena spectacular, it was just like Spinal Tap but throw in Christmas Carols and in progressive rock.  It was more like Hillsong.

Was it Christian Rock?

Being agnostic, the genre was confusing me, it was how I imagine Hillsong to be but then again does Hillsong have half naked dancers on podiums and stripper poles?


The Hallmark Chanel was the major sponsor, was this also some kind of clue?

Home of the made for TV midday movie with a caring and sharing message.

I looked around and the audience and demographic couldn’t help solve the puzzle. I was becoming more and more convinced it was Hillsong.  Would we soon start hugging it out and happy clapping?!

Out came the cigarette lighters in the air, or so I thought and soon realised it was mobile phones on the flashlight app being waved high in the air in tune to the music.  A light bulb went off overhead as I realised it had been some time since I had last been to a concert and it was when people did actually wave a lighter in the air.

Oh, how times have changed!  I really do need to get out more often.

I looked around to check on the 9-year-old to make sure he wasn’t having a flashing light-induced epileptic fit and he was loving it!  What wasn’t to love? It was loud, it was flashy and they had flames.

Those flames can pump out some heat.


Perhaps 9-year-old little boys are the target audience.  Was I sitting next to the band’s new No 1 Fan?   If the show had of ended then, perhaps but with never ending encore’s they had lost the number 1 fan’s interest and it was time for us to leave.

We left the same way we entered bumping and grinding past people trying to enjoy the show.

Had I just taken the 9-year-old to his first concert?

A progressive rock concert?


It can’t be!

Not having ever taken him to see the Wiggles or any other kids concert (would rather stick a pin in my eye) I was beginning to think it was and then I remembered that I had taken him to a performance when I was about to pop pregnant with him.


It was a concert that my friend Sarah had dragged us to as a guy she liked at the time was partaking.  She had begged The Canadian and I to come along as moral support.

Just like the Trans-Siberian concert, it was a night where we had no idea who was performing or what it was about when we took our seats.

Can you imagine our surprise when a guy sat down at a table and started scrunching paper?

Yep scrunching paper!

For what seemed like forever.  Then he changed things up and started crunching leaves.  It was the most torturous and funny night EVER.  We had silent tears rolling down our cheeks as all three of us could not contain ourselves but had to sob/laugh in silence in fear of being heard over the crushing of the leaves.

It went on and on and on and didn’t feel like it was ever going to end, eventually with the leaves and paper all crushed out it did end.  Then on came the guy Sarah liked to perform with little amps in front of him. Interesting what could follow such a riveting performance as the paper and leaf scruncher?

Why chainsaws of course!   We then had to sit through what seemed like forever of a guy manipulating the sounds of chainsaws.

Needless to say, he did not end up as the love of Sarah’s life!

Traumatised?  Majorly but then again it was one of the funniest and still most talked about nights The Canadian and I have had out.

I was texting my friend Sarah who is back in Australia throughout the Trans-Siberian Orchestra show sending her video updates.  Her hilarious text messages back had me sobbing with laughter just like she was sitting next to me at the concert.

We really need to lift our game and take the 9-year-old to an awesome concert, something legendary.  Due to the Ironman movies, he is kind of into Metallica, perhaps them or something heavy metal.

Then again maybe not.

We are off to New York in a couple of weeks and I’m dragging him to Radio City to the Rockettes.  Something more his thing can wait ………






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  • reocochran

    I loved this holiday concert via your blog!! Great photo captures and hilarious monologue, editorializing!! I have checked out your posts before and thought I was following you(?) Now, I am for sure!
    I have grandchildren who would also love this concert, which you were lucky to receive free tickets! Wow! 🙂

    • Maple Bacon Please!

      Thanks for the follow.

      It really was good fun and a win being free. We had a great week when it came to free events, my son was given 4 free tickets for the Ice Hockey last weekend. Perhaps I should have purchased a lottery ticket!

      • reocochran

        Yes, purchasing while you also had a period of luck in your income tax awhile back, I think I read!
        So glad you are enjoying Canada, I went to Toronto on my first honeymoon, as well as Niagara Falls! Toronto Hilton on the gorgeous bay was a wonderful place, as well as the area and restaurants, too.

  • Joanne Sisco

    I’m starting to think just about everyone I knew was at that concert this week. I’ve never been a huge concert fan. My hearing is very sensitive … And I’d kind of like to keep it that way 😉

    Enjoy the Rockettes. Loved them 🙂

  • pw19

    I’ve been to Hillsong in London, a number of years ago. A mate dragged me and two others there on a rainy Sunday afternoon. I’m still not sure why. We left after 10 minutes because we were about to be kicked out for filming the service/concert. Then we went to the pub.

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