It has been a yawn, yawn couple of days. I have been house bound with the 8-year-old who I suspect picked up something at the world’s skankiest Doctors surgery last week (refer to previous blog post).
Trapped at home and with time on my hands, I decided it was time to take care of the lady garden growing on my chin and re-open “Danielle’s house of hair removal”.
Since my 20’s I have battled with the hair above my upper lip however in the last few years and with what I suspect is the onslaught of perimenopause I seem to be turning into a primate.
On Saturday, I found myself looking in a mirror that had some exceptional light so optimum conditions for the tweezers to come out of retirement and remove some of the thicker hairs on my chinny, chin, chin. Staring back at me in the mirror was not a billy goat but it appears that since moving to Canada, I have morphed into a bearded bloody hipster!!!!
How did this happen? It’s a quick slip on the slide into Hipsterdom and I think this is how it went down.
Living in Australia I owned 1 plaid shirt, I am now the owner of a wardrobe that is 50 shades of plaid in only a few short months. I own more plaid than my husband.
I wear socks and sandals (well joke ones)
And I do have a love of Birkenstocks
I got prescribed my first pair of glasses last year and I love a craft beer.
I am currently attempting Febfast and not drinking alcohol for the month of February so no craft beers for me. I am very proud of my efforts this year as I am on Day 9, last year I only lasted until lunch time on Day 1.
Having read recently that Bearded Hipsters are on the way out and having always wondered if Bacteria breeds in those beards, I decided that it was time for the beard to go (not the plaid, I have actually fallen in love with all things plaid)
My usual removal method is waxing but after many years of trial and error my skin only likes one brand of wax and I have not been able to find it in the local pharmacies so I grabbed a box of depilatory cream.
Having never used depilatory cream before I read the instructions (twice) and even performed a patch test. When I opened the tube I thought it was a bit on the nose, applied a little patch, waited, washed it off and with no reaction, I applied it to the entire beard and moustache area of my face. At this point, I almost threw up from the smell, my gawd, it is so vile, this stuff stinks like rotten egg farts.
The instructions stated in big letters you shouldn’t leave it on for more than 5 minutes, I set a timer and waited. The manufacturer need not fear, due to the smell I couldn’t wait to get it off.
I washed it off and just like magic my face was left smoother than a baby’s bum, unfortunately, the smell did not wash down the sink with the hair. Our bathroom is an internal room without a window and even with the fan on it took hours for the smell to dissipate sadly I can’t say the same about the smell on myself. I couldn’t shake it or hide from myself. I think it’s best I am left in the dark what depilatory cream consists of but it works a treat.
Needing fresh air and escaping the stink we went to Fancy Franks Gourmet Hot Dogs for lunch.
I love some mystery meat and nothing is better than a lips and asshole in a bun. Franks are Hot Dogs on steroids, most of the Hot Dogs on the menu are a basic frankfurter in a bun but then pimped out with other ingredients. Last time we went to Franks, The Canadian who is always in a hurry put me under the pump when ordering and I wasn’t happy with my choice (as punishment I made him swap his dog for mine) but this time, I stood my ground, took my time, perused the menu and ordered a Po’Boy Gets Fancy.
Look at that thing!!!!!
2 Giant Panko crumbed shrimp, lettuce, horseradish mayo and hot sauce WITH a frankfurter of mystery meat in a soft hot dog roll.
It was good!
Speaking of good, one of the ups of being trapped at home is slow cooking and having something stewing away in the oven for dinner. Last night I made Baby Mac’s Slow Cooked Pulled Pork if you are looking for a pulled pork recipe Beth’s is the business. It is fool proof, super tasty and perfect if you are cooking for a crowd and want to spend more time on the wines with your friends then stuck in the kitchen. Last night it was just us so with plenty of leftovers dinner is sorted again for tonight.
The 8-year-old went back to school today and with all the serenity I enjoyed a Pancake Tuesday late breakfast/early lunch.
All these extra kilojoules should come in handy this weekend because we are getting hit with our first extreme cold since arriving. It’s a long weekend and we are going on a trip to Ottawa, just check out those weekend temps. I thought about postponing the trip but with similar weather in Toronto this weekend we may as well just hit the road.
Despite the impending weather I am enjoying researching things for us to do in Ottawa over the weekend.
If anyone is reading this with tips on must do’s for Ottawa … 3 … 2 … 1 … GO! Any tips much appreciated, please leave a comment.