Deportation

One of the first areas I wanted to explore upon our arrival in Toronto are the downtown neighborhoods of Corktown and The Distillery District.   As we get around and explore we are also on the hunt for an area that we want to move into and make home.  As a person who enjoys a fine tipple,  this sounded like it could have potential, and has the added bonus of having our mail sent to an address that sounds like we live in a Brewery.

We went for a stroll around the cobblestone streets and historic brick and sandstone buildings that are filled with restaurants, bars, shops, and galleries.  Apparently the minute spring has sprung and at the slightest sign temps are warming it becomes what is known as Patio Season in Toronto.  People take to the sidewalks, lanes, rooftops and outdoor areas of restaurants and bars to dine and drink and The Distillery District looks like it will be the place to be come, Summer.

DSC_0002DSC_0022Distillery DistrictDSC_0040

It was around 2’ish and as my blood sugar seems to drop if I don’t eat every 2 seconds and I get cranky (some would say crankier) I suggested lunch.  We found a lovely Bistro and Boulangerie called Cluny’s  (see what I did there??? I’m basically french).  The strange thing is in Toronto they call lunch, despite the fact it was 2 in the afternoon Brunch.  I have always thought of Brunch as a mid-morning meal between breakfast and lunch or a late breakfast early lunch but when it comes to food I’m always happy to go with the flow.

We walked into the restaurant only to find it packed with other “brunchers” and an approx 30-minute wait for a table.   I was then given another option of sitting in the bar straight away at high round tables with stools.   Due to my hunger pains and lack of blood pumping to the brain I jumped at the chance to dine in the bar, we sat down and I ordered a glass of wine.  This glass of wine wasn’t just a regular old glass of wine but much to my joy when you order wine by the glass in Canada you get the choice of 5oz or 8oz and nat urelement (see did it again, basically bilingual) I ordered the 8oz.  Food arrived (yummy) and one sip into the wine glass and over it goes only to be saved by Clyde’s wool jacket sitting on the stool next to me from smashing all over the antique tile floor.  I then red faced assessed the situation only to find that not only was Clyde’s jacket soaked to the bone in red wine but the gentleman sitting on the chair behind me with his jacket on the back of his chair was covered in red wine as well!!!

The guy and his lady friend must have been the only people in the restaurant not to have noticed what had just gone down, so, even more, red faced I let them know and every second word that came out of my mouth was an apology.   I then didn’t know if I should offer to pay for lunch, offer to pay for dry cleaning or just run away and hide.  With the lady friend giving me death daggers every time I turned around we took option C and I sculled the 2nd glass of wine the lovely waitress had brought over to me in my state of distress and purely for medicinal purposes and we made like bandits out of the restaurant before I got deported.

I have learned some very important lessons from my first Brunch in Toronto:

1/ Only ever drink white wine not red.

2/ Do not spill drinks over people’s coats in cold climates because once they go outside unable to wear wet coat they could possibly freeze to death.

3/ The wait is worth it for a table in a restaurant and never under any circumstances am I ever allowed to sit at high small round tables with stools EVER AGAIN

4 thoughts on “Deportation

  1. Ella

    Ha ha that’s hilarious – enjoying your blog too
    For the record I call it “dunch” a meal betwee lunch and dinner – you could teach those Canadians a few Aussie things or two!!!! 😄😄😄😄

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